GRIEF IS THE PRICE WE PAY FOR LOVE

NO CHILD SHOULD EVER HAVE TO BURY HER/HIS MOTHER… BUT I DID!

Do you ever sit back on your couch and look back at your life, where you feel as if you are sitting in a cinema all by yourself. You are watching a film with no one around you. To your great amusement, the film is nothing but a time-lapse of your life activities that took place at different points throughout your life?

LOSS AND GRIEF

Grief is like having broken ribs on the outside and you look fine but with every breath it hurts. Grieving is an individual experience, there is no way you can ever fully express the pain of losing a loved one. Time does not heal anything but it teaches us to live with the pain.

How we grieve varies based on one’s faith, life experience and how significant the loss was to you. There is no way you can make others understand the pain you have endured.

Allow me to take you on a short trip with me today, to see what I see and to feel what I feel.

Life was hard, but there was no way out of it. I had forgotten the little, joyous, and full-of-life child I once used to be, the only hope that kept me alive was my mother. At hard times, I would often close my eyes and feel my mother’s presence. Sitting beside me, tapping my head with love, telling me to gather up myself and fight my challenges because her child is strong, strong only.

I still remember when my mother’s voice over the phone would light up my whole weeks. I would wait for the weekends so that I could call my mother and talk to her about the little stuff that she would listen to with great interest. She speaks to me about it as we were sitting face-to-face, holding each other’s hands.

 

Now, every movie has a climax that breaks you apart into so many pieces that alone the thought of gathering up yourself breaks you even more. That part of my film was my “mother’s death.” Yes, you heard it right, when I could not expect the roller-coaster of my life to give me any more heart attacks, the call with the news of my mother’s demise rang.

Left wholly shocked, I tried to believe that it was all a lie, life was a lie, death was a lie. It’s just a story that I am reading from some intense thriller novel. But guess what, the weekends came, the phone that used to rang to my mother’s calls remained silent. And the silence was devouring. If I look back at things now, I don’t think I have ever been terrified by anything more than that silence.

Until you have buried someone you love, you may not understand how hard a holiday, death day, birthday or other days is without them

 “HOME FOR ME IS IN MY MOM’S HEART”

I had read somewhere that, “Life is a sentence, written in sadness, punctuated with happiness.” Suddenly the already running-scarce punctuations completely left my life’s sentence with the death of my mother. The time that followed will always remain the darkest of times for me. Coping with it is unimaginable, but my mother didn’t raise a weak girl, a strong girl is what she raised…!!!

But life moves on! Ups and downs, sorrow, loss, grief; they leave an impact on our lives, but it depends on us how we cope with them. If you are trying to escape from them, remember there never is any escape. You have to face and fight.”

Healing occurs gradually it cannot be forced or hurried it may be measured in days, months or even years down the line. What counts is letting the process to naturally unfold by acknowledging the pain, understanding that the process is unique to you, recognizing the difference between grief and depression.

GRIEF STEALS FROM THOSE LEFT BEHIND 

There is no formula on how we should grieve, no right or wrong way to grieve. The pain is overwhelming and coping with the loss of a loved one is one of the most difficult task anyone would want to go through.While grieving is mostly associated with death, other loss can cause grief such as miscarriage, loss of good health, divorce, losing a good job or loss of safety after trauma.

I am a woman who sparkled with joy and spread love everywhere I go. No one can guess that there is a woman behind this happy face who had ever experienced anger, anxiety, loss, grief, depression, failure, and stress. I successfully overcome them. In my opinion, “Ups and downs are a part of life, when you go up, enjoy the scenery, and when you down feel the beauty of your soul.”

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Remember! It is not the end of my story. I have much more to share about my life, personal experiences, success, and failure.

Be sure to stick around.

Lovely day.